I have varying opinions on this topic; because I have seen people trying to stay in touch, I have seen people who only try on their side and I have seen people who gave up.
Keeping in touch is a commitment, and just like any other commitment; they are all like plants that need to constantly be watered in order to grow. So I think there isn’t really one specific answer or reason why people lose or keep in touch. There are multiple reasons, circumstances, change in habits, or it could even be change in people.
A lot of people lose friendships from school because the only thing that they had in common with each other was just that – ‘school’. And when that was over, they find that they had nothing else of common interest that they could talk about or do because they were very different from each other outside of school. Mutually they realize that it is better that they let go.
Lifestyle changes could also lead to people losing touch; this is kind of the same thing as not having the same interests anymore. People constantly change and so the things that they have done a year ago, could probably not be the same as the things they do now; and so this could change the course of friendship if their lifestyle is not on par with that of their friends.
Many of us have egos. This could lead to thinking that we are better than everyone else, and so we don’t deem it important to contact people just to say hello. We believe that they should always call or text first. That you don’t really need them in your life anyway. If they want to stay they will and if they don’t, you really cannot be bothered. The person always initiating, or calling or texting, would get tired and eventually their friendship would fade.
The opposite of Ego would be insecurities. This is when someone finds that they are not as important or worthy of being loved. So even if they want to, they would find themselves stopping from texting or calling because they would think that their friends must be having a busier and important lifestyle than theirs; that they are not part of. And this also comes under the same categories of assumptions. When one keeps assuming that the other person is busy, or that the other person would not take their call, or that the other person does not like them anymore (we are all children in our hearts anyway)… And so on and so forth.
Lastly, the bitter truth, one that is hard to admit; that maybe you were not important enough to hold on to. Some of us think that we hold on importance, and we try hard enough to keep up with things happening in our loved ones lives, until it reaches a certain point where we realize that we are the only one’s trying and that is very tiring. You reach a point where you give up and you realize, that some things weren’t meant to be.
If anything needs you to make effort more than you want to or takes your peace away; be it friendships, work, other relationships, then it is not worth holding on to.